Fleur Noire

fernsandmoss:

Raf Simons Spring/Summer 1998

Raf Simons Spring/Summer 1998

yourbeautifulmind:

ten myths about being spiritual
Myth 1 - All is Love and Light and I love everyone!

I wish. Our world can be a difficult place, and we are capable of awful things. Trying to believe otherwise will only stop you from being able to deal with the problem at hand. Be faithful to reality, not a perfectionist ideal; but don’t fall into despair or pity, either. Try to see each situation as it comes, as it is, without your positive or negative judgment filter on it. Even the wisest people can feel irritation, disgust or even hate. The difference is that they don’t jump from a passing feeling to a value judgment, or make a bad situation worse by acting or speaking from that place.
Myth 2 - All-acceptance and selflessness’ means that you have to let people take your money, spouse, body, self-respect.
Selflessness does not mean that you must walk like a wally into destructive situations – that’s twisted. You must take care of yourself before you can take care of others. Even if you did give people everything they think they want, you’d be feeding their greed impulse and making it worse. It’s ok to maintain your boundaries, and only give when it feels absolutely right to you. All-acceptance and selflessness are guidelines intended for the internal world, not the material one. Of course when put into practice they eventually have material outcomes, but that will come naturally if you take care of the inside first. Don’t let people take advantage.
Myth 3 - Anything goes.
Many of us have tried this path out, and I don’t regret it because I now know that it leads to despair – so I don’t miss it. A happy and productive human life needs self-control, though don’t confuse that with self-repression and piousness. As one Tibetan lama put it, when you build a corral for your horse, don’t make it too big or the horse will remain wild; but don’t build it too small either, because your horse needs room to move.
Myth 4 - If I do everything right, bad things won’t happen to me.
It is true that it’s possible to cut a lot of crap out of your life, and to grow a more productive state of mind, so that your life eventually improves on all fronts. But there isn’t a magic place where bad things are guaranteed not to happen. You will become better at dealing with them though. Even accomplished monks still have to deal with some extremely difficult life situations from time to time. The Buddha taught that we all get old, we all get sick, and we all die. Counter-intuitively, the way to escape suffering is not to run from it, but to embrace it – spiritually speaking. If you’re suffering, make room to sit with those feelings on your own, and allow them to arise fully. Feel them as completely as you can, just for half an hour. Doing this every day is the way to freedom.
Myth 5 - I have to be big and shiny, like Tony Robbins.
See Myth 1. You are who you are. When I first encountered the man who is now my teacher, an accomplished and renowned master, he was so understated that I didn’t notice him at all. Having a big personality and being wise are not necessarily mutually exclusive, but they don’t come hand-in-hand either.
Myth 6 - The Secret.
First of all, if it’s true that you get what you really really concentrate on, a lot more of us would be millionaires with sex on a stick. And even if that was the case, it would be neither spiritual nor a great secret. The only thing that’s great about it is the PR department.
Myth 7 - Enlightened people are incapable of doing stupid things.
Yes, I was disappointed too. They stay human. It is possible to be wise in some areas, and unwise in others. ‘Enlightenment’ could be defined as having a deep understanding of the nature of existence. But some people who have this, have not necessarily figured out yet how to be kind or honest for example. There is spiritual intelligence and there’s emotional intelligence, and they don’t come hand-in-hand. The psychological imprint or conditioning that you have as a person is not completely wiped out if you have a spiritual experience. Or in other words – stuff always needs work.
Myth 8 - My teacher/ spirit guide knows better than me.
It’s true that there are people with great insight, and sometimes it’s tempting to hand all our choices over to them. But even if they wanted to, nobody other than you can know what the right thing is for you to do in any given situation. It would be wise to learn to trust your own judgment and not give that power to anyone else. A genuine teacher will keep pointing you back to your own intuition, and if you try to give them your will, they’ll hand it right back to you.
Myth 9 - Bankers can’t be spiritual.
Why not? Banking is the administration of money, which is the system of exchange that our society decided on a long time ago. Administrators can be spiritual, chefs can be spiritual, cleaners, athletes, people in the dole queue; you name it. Unless you’re an executioner or dictator, your profession is unlikely to be inherently immoral. You do your best with what you’ve got. Having said that, there are situations where people have felt the need to disengage in order to uphold their values. But that can happen in any profession – including charity work.
Myth 10 - I have to give up fun stuff.
Thankfully this is untrue (unless your idea of fun is really sick!) Your spirituality can’t leave you. Everyone needs to relax; my great master in Japan had a particular penchant for TV wrestling shows. One monk I know collects yo-yos, and another was seen swishing down the monastic driveway in roller blades. So light entertainment is unlikely to lead you astray. Steaks and women can be slightly trickier ethical areas, but no matter your interests, you’re still allowed to become a Buddhist. We all have desires but regular meditation strengthens your ability to choose. You’d become less and less a slave to passion, and could instead choose which desires you want to indulge. So meditation practice makes choice stronger – not weaker. At the same time you become more aware of the inevitable consequences of your actions, and so you can steer your life better. Consequences are going to happen regardless of if you believe in them or not, so you might as well take a closer look at them, before they take you by surprise again.
Myth 10-and-a-half - I am going to learn to levitate.
Hmm that might just be possible. But what would be the point?
article source here
many thanks for the image to elige

ten myths about being spiritual

Myth 1 - All is Love and Light and I love everyone!

I wish. Our world can be a difficult place, and we are capable of awful things. Trying to believe otherwise will only stop you from being able to deal with the problem at hand. Be faithful to reality, not a perfectionist ideal; but don’t fall into despair or pity, either. Try to see each situation as it comes, as it is, without your positive or negative judgment filter on it. Even the wisest people can feel irritation, disgust or even hate. The difference is that they don’t jump from a passing feeling to a value judgment, or make a bad situation worse by acting or speaking from that place.
Myth 2 - All-acceptance and selflessness’ means that you have to let people take your money, spouse, body, self-respect.
Selflessness does not mean that you must walk like a wally into destructive situations – that’s twisted. You must take care of yourself before you can take care of others. Even if you did give people everything they think they want, you’d be feeding their greed impulse and making it worse. It’s ok to maintain your boundaries, and only give when it feels absolutely right to you. All-acceptance and selflessness are guidelines intended for the internal world, not the material one. Of course when put into practice they eventually have material outcomes, but that will come naturally if you take care of the inside first. Don’t let people take advantage.
Myth 3 - Anything goes.
Many of us have tried this path out, and I don’t regret it because I now know that it leads to despair – so I don’t miss it. A happy and productive human life needs self-control, though don’t confuse that with self-repression and piousness. As one Tibetan lama put it, when you build a corral for your horse, don’t make it too big or the horse will remain wild; but don’t build it too small either, because your horse needs room to move.
Myth 4 - If I do everything right, bad things won’t happen to me.
It is true that it’s possible to cut a lot of crap out of your life, and to grow a more productive state of mind, so that your life eventually improves on all fronts. But there isn’t a magic place where bad things are guaranteed not to happen. You will become better at dealing with them though. Even accomplished monks still have to deal with some extremely difficult life situations from time to time. The Buddha taught that we all get old, we all get sick, and we all die. Counter-intuitively, the way to escape suffering is not to run from it, but to embrace it – spiritually speaking. If you’re suffering, make room to sit with those feelings on your own, and allow them to arise fully. Feel them as completely as you can, just for half an hour. Doing this every day is the way to freedom.
Myth 5 - I have to be big and shiny, like Tony Robbins.
See Myth 1. You are who you are. When I first encountered the man who is now my teacher, an accomplished and renowned master, he was so understated that I didn’t notice him at all. Having a big personality and being wise are not necessarily mutually exclusive, but they don’t come hand-in-hand either.
Myth 6 - The Secret.
First of all, if it’s true that you get what you really really concentrate on, a lot more of us would be millionaires with sex on a stick. And even if that was the case, it would be neither spiritual nor a great secret. The only thing that’s great about it is the PR department.
Myth 7 - Enlightened people are incapable of doing stupid things.
Yes, I was disappointed too. They stay human. It is possible to be wise in some areas, and unwise in others. ‘Enlightenment’ could be defined as having a deep understanding of the nature of existence. But some people who have this, have not necessarily figured out yet how to be kind or honest for example. There is spiritual intelligence and there’s emotional intelligence, and they don’t come hand-in-hand. The psychological imprint or conditioning that you have as a person is not completely wiped out if you have a spiritual experience. Or in other words – stuff always needs work.
Myth 8 - My teacher/ spirit guide knows better than me.
It’s true that there are people with great insight, and sometimes it’s tempting to hand all our choices over to them. But even if they wanted to, nobody other than you can know what the right thing is for you to do in any given situation. It would be wise to learn to trust your own judgment and not give that power to anyone else. A genuine teacher will keep pointing you back to your own intuition, and if you try to give them your will, they’ll hand it right back to you.
Myth 9 - Bankers can’t be spiritual.
Why not? Banking is the administration of money, which is the system of exchange that our society decided on a long time ago. Administrators can be spiritual, chefs can be spiritual, cleaners, athletes, people in the dole queue; you name it. Unless you’re an executioner or dictator, your profession is unlikely to be inherently immoral. You do your best with what you’ve got. Having said that, there are situations where people have felt the need to disengage in order to uphold their values. But that can happen in any profession – including charity work.
Myth 10 - I have to give up fun stuff.
Thankfully this is untrue (unless your idea of fun is really sick!) Your spirituality can’t leave you. Everyone needs to relax; my great master in Japan had a particular penchant for TV wrestling shows. One monk I know collects yo-yos, and another was seen swishing down the monastic driveway in roller blades. So light entertainment is unlikely to lead you astray. Steaks and women can be slightly trickier ethical areas, but no matter your interests, you’re still allowed to become a Buddhist. We all have desires but regular meditation strengthens your ability to choose. You’d become less and less a slave to passion, and could instead choose which desires you want to indulge. So meditation practice makes choice stronger – not weaker. At the same time you become more aware of the inevitable consequences of your actions, and so you can steer your life better. Consequences are going to happen regardless of if you believe in them or not, so you might as well take a closer look at them, before they take you by surprise again.
Myth 10-and-a-half - I am going to learn to levitate.
Hmm that might just be possible. But what would be the point?

article source here

many thanks for the image to elige